this post is to everyone.
lately,
i felt like i've hurt a lot of people.
partly because i'm a blunt person
partly because i say things how they are,
rather than beating around the bush.
partly because i can be selfish,
and partly because i'm such a jokester,
that some people take me seriously.
however,
i am NOT justifying that it is okay,
i am not saying it's okay for me to hurt people's feelings.
but i'm sincerely apologizing
to all those i have hurt.
if i have hurt your feelings
in any way, shape, or form,
i ask you to please let me know
so that i can sincerely apologize
to you in the proper manner.
i set a new year's resolution and i've been
trying to accomplish that very hard this year.
and i really hope i haven't hurt anyone's feelings,
but i know i've hurt some,
and immediately apologized to them.
i try to be the most kind, caring, and as good of a person i can be.
&& i hate hearing that i hurt people's feelings on accident,
but i would really like to know.
because 90% of the time,
when someone is holding a grudge,
you never know that they are holding a grudge against you.
from the bottom of my heart,
i'm truly sorry.
honey, that is so great of you to make an apology - especially publicly. it's hard for people (me sometimes, too) to apologize, because of pride. however, over the recent years i have learned that life is too too toooooo short to even think about letting pride getting in the way of making amends with people. for a couple reasons, what if they died?? you wouldn't want to live with the "hate" or "disgust" in your heart, knowing they are no longer here. or for the simple fact they may know you hate them and come and try and harm you...
ReplyDeletedon't know why i decided to write you a novel, but i did.
i love you.
this was inspiring.
keep your head up!!
xoxo
It’s a little windy and chilly outside in L.A. today. I was listening to Pandora when one of my favorite bands, Temper Trap, Fools, came on. I wanted to get the lyrics and pulled it up on You Tube. There was a related video with Peter Bjorn and John who I also like a lot, it was a remix of Fools it sounded pretty good.
ReplyDeleteThere was a Peter Bjorn song I wanted to put up on Facebook, so I posted it and then saw a friend was now a friend with a few other people, you know, where it shows all the pictures, and there was a cute girl so I clicked on it so I could see it larger to see who ‘Amanda’ was, just out of curiosity.
She was from Ohio where I am originally from. Her quote said “I am a Buckeye” which I loved. I loved her other quote too though, that was “Everything happens for a reason…". I don’t think I had seen it before and I really liked it. I didn’t think she had written it herself and so looked it up to see who it was attributed to. The Google search had all these blog entries for an ‘Amanda’, It was called “Pay it Forward” which always gets me, so I clicked one and landed on Death.
There was the quote in the sidebar, by Marilyn Monroe. I read the blog entry on Death, and I really thought it was well done. I had some young friends die together when I was in college which was pretty tragic. The way Amanda related to and was affected by a fellow blogger who had died was pretty touching, and kind of a “small world” thing.
She hadn’t known her personally, which made it kind of sad, and made us think about how we can be sad about the death of people we really don’t even know personally. Kind of melancholy, but there was such a positive and life affirming message in her thoughts.
Suddenly in the quiet, one of my favorite songs started playing. It was upbeat and haunting, with soaring drawn out vocals. I wanted to turn it up. You Tube, had stopped playing and I scrolled up and down the page to see if another video had started out of the blue, but no. Pandora had been paused so I opened it to see if it had started again, but it hadn’t. Temper Trap, fools was just paused there. I was a little confused for a second trying to figure where the music was coming from.
It was on Amanda’s blog page, her play list had just started playing Sweet Disposition, by Temper Trap.
“Don’t stop ‘til it’s over. Don’t stop to surrender.”
I was just having one of those moments, of “what a coincidence?!” At the same time reflecting on “Everything happens for a reason….” Things are either a coincidence or they happen for a reason…and I was trained to believe that there is no such thing as coincidence.
I wondered if these young girls knew each other. They seemed to be in the same age range, and shared at least their first names, and a favorite quote together. I didn’t know either of them obviously, but I liked them, one for being a proud Buckeye, and one for a pay it forward spirit. All of us believe that things happen for a reason. So I just felt like I should introduce these two, share this stupid little story with both, and somehow wondered if they would become friends, learn a thing or two from each other that made some type of difference down the road, or just brighten each other’s day, even just for a minute, like they both had mine.
And without wanting anything in return except to introduce them to one another, I jotted down my story and sent it to both Amanda and Amanda. I hope they each like the story, but I hope they both get something sweet or meaningful or affirming from the other, and somehow I just feel like they will, even if it is just a smile that comes out of nowhere, like I got.
CHET WALL
PS
ReplyDeleteLooking up the lyrics for Sweet Disposition, I saw a posted comment by anonymous that really struck me as coincidental… but perhaps, there are no coincidences. Cute story/comment:
http://www.songlyrics.com/temper-trap/sweet-disposition-lyrics/
“this song is woven into my story. i was seventeen when we first met and completely dilusional of love or anything close to it. he showed me that everything happens for a reason. nothing happens by chance, rather by fate. everything has its exact moment where things play out to a certain rhythm. and our rhythms coincided perfectly. then i was force to leave due to our current economy and i was lead to believe that what we had first started that summer had faded. fast forward three years and he has showed me that 500 miles wont stop him from loving me and his faith in us is what keeps me strong. two more years and we will have the opportunity to be together again..........every time he gives me butterflies i hear this song as if it was so eloquently created for us.”
Yeah, SO odd.
I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they’re right. and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. -Marilyn Monroe
AMANDA N’S BLOG
http://amandanielsen8.blogspot.com/2010_07_01_archive.html
Amanda W’s facebook
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=502374254